Marumahoko's "Miss Me But Let Me Go" explores post...

Marumahoko's "Miss Me But Let Me Go" explores post-break-up life

Bridget Mabanda

Giving up after a failed relationship is not an option when you go through Nyasha Marumahoko’s book Miss Me But Let Me Go, which is precisely a warning tale of pitfalls of a failed relationship.

It exposes the difficulties people face after separation and is aimed at reducing suicides, depression, heartbreaks due to relationship mishaps, over and above offering pre-relationship counselling and coping with life after separation.

It highlights important facts that one should expect before entering into a relationship so that she or he can prepare for any possible outcome.

“Life is full of surprises and some are not pleasant. Whatever happens, it is more important that one does not lose him/herself in the process. People hope for the best in a relationship but people need to embrace that things may not go according to plans and expectations,” Marumahoko said.

He said failure to cope with relationship or marriage issues has given birth to suicide, an ill that is wreaking havoc among teenagers and grown-ups. Therefore, Marumahoko believes, one should be prepared physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually against any outcome.

Moving on is not the same as finding someone new, meaning that moving on is accepting the reality and letting go of the previous relationship, another author, Prachi Gangwani, once said.

Recently, a dealer at Harare’s Ximex Mall Tafadzwa “Boss Pango” Murengwa, committed suicide inside a car after fatally shooting his ex-lover, Samantha Dzapata.

Tafadzwa noted in the audio, that he spent money on his girlfriend to the extent of providing for Samantha’s family as a way of showing the love he had for Samantha but claimed she was cheating on him.

No matter how much Boss Pango spent on Samantha, he did not get what he expected, meaning investment is not a guarantee that the person will be with you forever.

Their relationship lacked mutual exchange of energy and support as Tafadzwa was expecting.

Marumahoko said he wrote the book after observing an increase in suicides and mental health as a result of people failing to move on from their spouses after separation.

In the last few months of 2021, a Harare Polytechnic student and two from Great Zimbabwe University in Masvingo, committed suicide.

Earlier the same year, two students at the National University of Science Technology (NUST) took their own lives.

Relationship issues reportedly played a role in some of the incidents.

According to the 2019 data provided by the World Health Organisation, 14 people out of 100 000 in the population in Zimbabwe die due to suicide.

Using the latest data from WHO Zimbabwe is ranked 34 in terms of suicide rate in the world and fifth in Africa.

Suicide cases in Zimbabwe in general, seem to be on rise judging by suicide numbers of people aged between 15 and 35.

Marumahoko highlights that emotional attachment is one of the causes of suicide after separation.

The life coach-cum-writer says there is lack of awareness among Zimbabweans regarding the life after separation.

Government, previously through the Ministry of Health and Child Care, said that it will initiate plans to develop a national suicide hotline but did not specify when this will become operational.

People, especially motivational speakers, usually speak on the positive side of the relationships rather than also highlighting the challenges one might face along the way.

“People have to be told the truth that though we hope for the best it is very important to understand that sometimes things might not go the ways we have planned and the book explains that,” Marumahoko added.

He, however, said the book might not have reached to many people as he used WhatsApp groups and Facebook to market the book and he is not well-known.

Marumahoko has another title under his belt, Becoming a Pacesetter.